All Time OSU Football Draft

Nolo, Amilian, my buddy Sheets, and I got together the other day and held an epic two-day all-time Oklahoma State football draft via email. The rules were that everybody had the same offensive line and you had to draft eight guys (1 QB, 2 RB, 3 WR, 1 TE, and 1 ATH) to fill out your offensive squad. We probably spent 10 hours on this.

I know it’s stunning that the four of us have posted a combined 22 months of marriage in our 100+ years on earth. Let’s get to it.

Nolan: I say we pick the order of the draft by all guessing how many times Tim Tebow is mentioned on the NFL page of ESPN.com. We’ll have to assume none of us cheat though.

Sheets: Eight.

Nolo: I’ll go five.

Kyle: Two.

Nolo: Well that didn’t work because Kyle cheated.

Amilian: Three.

Nolo: I saw two unless you guys see something different. And did Amilian reply? Did I miss something? Was this a terrible idea?

Round 1

Kyle: No, it was awesome, I won. With the #1 pick I select….I can’t believe I actually debated this…Barry Sanders.

Amilian: I’m taking Weeden. The QB spot is by far the thinnest of these positions and I’m not trying to get stuck with Aso Pogi.

Sheets: What a pick from Matt, I didn’t see that coming, throws off my snake picks.

Nolo: I’m taking Dez Bryant with the 3^rd overall pick.  You can say what you want about him, but give me the jump ball to Dez every time we get in the red zone over any other play. He is still, in my mind, the most talented receiver OSU has ever had.

Kyle: Gah it’s going to be fun to argue about these teams.

Amilian: As bad as I wanted to take an athlete, I couldn’t pass up the best QB in school history. If that was debatable, I might have taken a top WR, but it wasn’t.

Sheets: I’m going with Thurman…

Round 2

Sheets: …and Hart Lee, Hart Lee can come down with anything Aso Pogi throws up there and Thurman can play a little too.

Nolo: This is going to be the toughest pick of the draft for me.  I don’t want to leave Matty Weeden2Blackmon, but I don’t want Aso Pogi throwing jump balls to Bryant and Blackmon either. I have to take the 2 time Biletnikoff award winner though since he’s technically the 2^nd best football player we’ve ever had. Give me Bryant and Blackmon on the outside. Who’s going to cover me?

Kyle: Justin Gilbert after I take a cloning machine with my last pick.

Sheets: So I guess we can just put you down for Justin Gilbert and the cloning machine from Multiplicity for your snake picks coming up?

Kyle: Well it’s Amilian’s pick so I don’t want to overplay my hand.

Amilian: Who’s going to throw to them?  That pick initially pissed me off. The recent success of Blackmon and Dez overshadows Rashaun‘s dominance in 2002-03.  He was a two-time All-American, holds the record for most TD receptions in a game and there’s always the 0:48 mark of this. Any guy who brings tears to eyes of Sooners two years in a row is welcome on my squad, however I might need to expand outside of the OKC metro area for my third pick.

Nolo:  On you Pistols Boy.

Nolo: Wait, how did Hart Lee Dykes get drafted before Blackmon and Rashaun?  Maybe I don’t know what I’m talking about because I was born in 1987 but was he really better than those two?

Sheets: He caused 4 schools to basically get the living death penalty bidding for his services…

Nolo: I guess that makes Craig James the best college running back of all time?

Kyle: Haha “Pistols Boy” is hilarious. This is a really tough drafting position btw. The QBs left are all the same in my eyes and it’s too early for WoltGerrisunn [spits tobacco] so I guess I’ll go Adarius Bowman…

Round 3

Kyle: …and Alonzo Mayes. The downside is that with my 7th round pick I’m going to have to draft all the weed they can possibly handle. PS: Dykes also went in the first round in baseball. He was probably the best athlete OSU has ever had.

Amilian: Jealous of your Alonzo pick. Am I wrong in saying Kendall Hunter is already one of the most underrated players in OSU history? He was incredible. I’m a little disappointed in myself for not reaching into the pre-2000 squads yet, but talent is sparse in those eras and I doubt Kendall falls back to me given Nolan hasn’t taken a RB yet.

Sheets: I wanted Mayes sooooo bad.

Nolo: Daggummit I was hopin’ y’all would forget about WoltGerrisunnn [spits tobacco]!  I have no idea who Alonzo Mayes is. What position does he play?

Sheets: He’s our best TE ever.

Amilian: Hands down. Luckily for Nolan, talent at OSU was sparse pre-2000 so there aren’t too many Alonzo Mayes type of guys he’ll be missing out on.

Nolo: I actually like where I’m at right now.  I have a few guys in mind at running back and I have by far the best receiving corps. I just need somebody to throw to them. I’m taking, statistically, the 2^nd best quarterback in OSU history. Somebody who knows how to run and gun and who is an absolute gamer. A guy who can toss a jump ball with the best of them. The guy who, in my mind, put OSU football on the map more than any player in the Gundy era.  That’s right, the sexiest eyes in college football, Zac Robinson.

Amilian: The problem with that statement is that nobody in the Gundy era put OSU on the map. Les Miles did. Don’t hate your pick, just arguing against your reasoning.

Sheets: I guess I’m going to take Prentiss Elliot for my speed guy at WR, I know he only played one year but I still believe he was one of the three fastest to ever play here, so I’ll have size and speed outside.

Round 4

Sheets: …and David Thompson for another RB, he’s like 3rd all time rushing for us and I know he ran for lots of yards on some really crappy teams when I was like 9. Plus I think he may have rocked the original all blacks if I remember correctly, which were way sicker than the current ones. I guess you can pencil me in for Tony Lindsay at QB in round 6.

Kyle: Arrrrrgh, I wanted Prentiss.

Amilian: Not to mention if you throw him on defense he might stab Barry after a tackle.

Amilian: Hurry up Nolan, I have a feeling my pick will upset pistolsguy. Btw, “Pistols Boy” was excellent. Shocked it took one of us this long to think of that.

Sheets: Every now and then Nolan will just drop such a simple yet eloquent joke and it’ll be perfect.

Nolo: Since I still feel like there are a number of quality of running backs available, and I feel like there’s a pretty big drop off at tight end after this next guy, I’m going with Brandon Pettigrew.  I have a sleeper I don’t think you guys are going to guess who is going to be the steal of the draft.  And not in the Onterrio Smith kind of way.

Kyle: Traber?

Amilian: Is it Rick Amilian?  Okay, R.W. McQuarters. If you were to rank all-time OSU ATHs, he’s at the top. Amazing versatility (WR, DB, KR, PR).

Sheets: DANGIT!!!! He was gonna be my athlete!

Kyle: F.

Amilian: And who could Nolan possibly pick that would slip by the rest of us???

Sheets: Maybe he’s going with Jaamal Fobbs

Nolo: [Evil “Oh really, Kansas?  You’re going to single cover Dez Bryant on the goal line AGAIN?!” style Dana Holgerson laugh]

Kyle: I’m going to go Mike Gundy at QB because I don’t want to be stuck with lead-foot Fields scrambling around the backfield and because I need a wild-eyed gunslinger to match passes with Weeden and ZMFR…

Round 5

Kyle: …then I’ll take Tatum Bell and his flailing chin straps to kick off the 5th round.

Amilian: I’m having more trouble than I expected right here.  There would be more decent options at WR/TE had we not adopted the run-run-pass offense in the 90s.  I’m somewhat embarrassed to make this next pick, but I’m determined to fill another WR spot right here and can’t think of anyone I’d put ahead of him so I’ll do it…DeJuan Woods.

Kyle: You couldn’t even spell it right.

Amilian: D’Juan, whatever.  I’m white.

Sheets: Don’t feel bad, he was a potential for me too. This is where Nolan takes Torrence Carr.

Amilian: It’s more of an embarrassment to Bob Simmons that I couldn’t think of one WR of his I would take over D’Juan.

Kyle: If somebody takes Anthony Parks, I’m going to lose my mind.

Nolo: I’m STRUGGLING to find my next guy.

Sheets: Gabe Lindsay.

Amilian: Lol, that was better than my Nathan Simmons suggestion.   After the draft, I think we should all get a limited number of words to argue why they have the best team.

Kyle: Let’s all remember this next time some of these idiot students try to say we’re one of the best football programs in the country.

Sheets: Houston Nutt might just be my QB, guys.

Nolo: I agree.  I’m going to take a glue guy. Great slot receiver to compliment Bryant/Blackmon on the outside and one of the only good receivers left. I’m going to with Josh Cooper. Have fun with Anthony Parks, Sheets.

Kyle: Nolan’s whole team played together at one point…

Nolo: Yep. They were all on the best teams in OSU has ever had. Josh Cooper won more games than anyone in OSU history. I’ll take him over Hart Lee. They’ll have great chemistry.

Kyle: Don’t say foolish things.

Sheets: I’m going to take a TE that Nolan wont remember but he was a good one that played for the Giants until off the field issues cost him..Marcellus Rivers…

Round 6

Sheets: …and for my glue guy I’ll go Adarius Bowman…yea I picked him and Prentiss Elliot.

Kyle: That would be nice, but I took Bowman in the second round.

Sheets: I don’t remember that, but ill go with John Lewis soley for the catch he made to ice the Nebraska game in 2002. And for some reason I watched that game on Bourbon Street with my dad.

Nolo: I’ve never heard of Marcellus Rivers or John Lewi…wait…isn’t John Lewis the the guy we thought might be diabetic homeless guy we gave the pint of banana pudding to in Birmingham on our way to the OSU/UGA game back in 2007?!  I haven’t heard that name before or since until just now and I busted out laughing.  RIP John Lewis. Moving on…I’ll take a 2 time All-American in 1976 and 1977 and the 5^th overall pick in the 1978 NFL draft.  A player who finished #2 in the Heisman voting to Earl Campbell in 1977 and has two of the top 10 rushing seasons in OSU history. I’m taking Terry Miller.

Kyle: Yeah, one and the same John Lewis.

Sheets: I was gonna take Terry Miller where I took Thompson, but I wanted to take some one I have recollection of. Good pick, Nolan. Good use of Google.

Nolo: Thanks Johnnie!  I actually knew some of that because I looked him up when I got a phone call from Terry Miller here at Dell.  That was one of the more random things that’s happened to me.  I guess I Googled him then though…Whatever.

Amilian: Yeah I was getting ready to say that Nolan has been Wikipedia-ing this morning. I wanted Terry. But no problem, I’ll back up Kendall at RB with the Blonde Bomber, Bob Fenimore. He would have been a nice fit in the ATH spot for one of you, although I doubt any of you could pull the trigger on a white guy for that position. A two-time All American, #1 overall pick in the draft, and College Football Hall of Famer…yeah I’ll take him in the 6th round.

Nolo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!  That was my guy!  I never thought you’d find him!  I mean obviously he wouldn’t stand a chance in today’s game because of the forward pass and because black people are allowed to play, but on paper, he’s phenomenal.

Amilian: You didn’t think one of the three of us would think about taking Fenimore??? Give us some credit!

Kyle: I almost took him three rounds ago. My gosh we are brutal at WR after the top five or six. It’s absurd how thin we are there historically. Also, can we talk about how when you google “BJ Tiger” my site is the 8th hit? I’ll take TD Bryant and….

7th Round

Kyle: Can I draft a RB and play him in the slot if he actually caught a lot of passes in real life?

Nolo: I mean you could…but they wouldn’t be better than Tracy Moore…or Damian Davis.

Sheets: I say prob not unless they caught a lot of passes, Vernand Morency catching a few balls doesn’t count.

Nolo: The fact that we have to ask the question is pretty embarrassing.

Kyle: Okay then I’ll take Joe Randle as my ATH and figure out what to do with my last WR position later…

Nolo: Great. You each just took the two guys I wanted.  Awesome. It’s okay though OSU doesn’t run many 2 back sets and I like my odds with my Cooper/Blackmon/Bryant/Pettigrew/Robinson passing game.

Sheets: Yea well I’m gonna be a running team, control the clock.

Nolo: Perfect. Good luck against Navy in the PapaJohns.com Bowl.

Sheets: Alabama and LSU seemed to do fine with that style last year. And playing a service academy is a great honor that my university would appreciate having.

Nolo: Haha nice.  It’s tough when you have two perfect comebacks for a statement but one is a rebuttal and one is self-deprecating.

Amilian: I am consulting with an outside part on filling my last WR position. I will make my pick soon. Btw if Gundy had given Walsh the nod, could you have said that Monken was running the offense…invo-lunt-arily? Ohhhhhhh I’m here all week.

Nolo: Just make your pick you idiot.

Amilian: Okay, my pick for the draft is WR from the late 80s, Curtis Mayfield. Someone I know little (okay, nothing) about but I’m going to rely on my source for this one.

Nolo: You would have been better off going with Charlie Moore based on his spring game performance but whatever. I know I’m going to get crucified for this next pick, but since the Blonde Bomber and Joe Randle got snatched from me, I’m going to take Keith Toston!

Despite having to add an exclamation point at the end of that last sentence to make this pick a little more exciting, I actually believe in it after a bit of additional research. Terry Miller will get the majority of the work on my squad, but Toston will be great in short yardage and goal line situations. His senior year he had over 1200 yards and 11 TDs despite splitting carries with Zac, Kendall Hunter (who got hurt), and Beau Johnson. He was also our third leading receiver that year with 25 receptions and 261 yards. To top it off, he completed more passes than Alex Cate. Toston FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amilian: Nolan fumbled his 7th round pick.

Sheets: I’m going with Walt Garrison for my ATH, same strategy as Matt, as I’m sure you all know he could catch too as he led the Dallas Cowboys in receiving in 1971 and retired as the 3rd leading rusher and 4th in receiving for America’s team. At OSU he was All -Big 8 his senior year and was named outstanding rusher at the senior bowl and the college all star game against the Green Bay Packers. He started out at OSU playing LB so he is the definition of the ATH position.

Round 8

Sheets: At QB I had to debate this but decided on Josh Fields, I don’t need or want any mobility, just someone who can throw the deep ball and is the real gamer at OSU, not Zac, having beat OU two times.

Kyle: You’re not going to get many golf outings out of Zac with comments like that.

Sheets: Well he won’t be winning many tournaments then…

Nolo: Interesting. I’ll take overall success over success vs. OU. I also had no idea Wolt Gerrisunnn hadn’t been taken or I would have snatched him up just so I could have him begin and end every speech with “To the BONE”.

Nolo: With my last pick (and I can’t believe I fudged up the Walt Garrison pick knowing I would be able to get Toston in the 8^th round) I’m going to go with the ultimate team guy as my ATH. This guy started on both sides of the ball during his OSU career and never complained once about where he was lined up despite being moved to defense after starting at quarterback as a freshman. One of my quarterbacks gets hurt? No problem, he threw for 13 touchdowns as a freshman.  Running backs?  He had 10 rushing touchdowns that year too. He also saw time in the NFL as a linebacker after his career at OSU was over. I could have gone with my brother Perrish Cox here, but what Donovan Woods brings maturity and selflessness to the table that will give my squad the chemistry to put them over the top.

Amilian: Donovan…lol. Billy Bajema to fill up my roster.

Nolo: You just “LOL’d” then drafted Billy Bajema.

Amilian: You say that as if I had a better option for TE.

Kyle: I want to take Darrent Williams RIP or BJ Tiger here so badly but I already blew my ATH spot on Randle. Did you guys know Hubert Anyiam and Bo Bowling are among our all time leaders in receptions per season. All time! I can’t with a good conscience pick Tracy Moore so that leaves me with the indomitable Hermann Eben who put up cool thou plus seven scores in 1970 (which is like 3k and 40 with Weeds throwing to him). Plus he makes Zac look like the love child of Blake Griffin and Joakim Noah.

Nolo: Yes, I was actually surprised nobody took Bo Bowling.  That’s not good.

Kyle: These teams are so weird and great.

Nolo: Hart Lee Dykes, Prentiss Elliot, and John Lewis provide a lot of selflessness and chemistry at WR for Sheets’ squad.  How he didn’t draft Fenimore back to back with Thurman is beyond me. I had never heard of three guys on Kyle’s team, two on Amilian’s team, and three on Sheets’ team before this draft started.

Sheets: When this started I thought all the teams would be stacked, I never realized how shallow we are at every position other than RB.

Nolo: You guys ready to get started on a basketball draft now?

Kyle: It would be awesome to do a 10-person bball draft.

Nolo: I would get SMOKED.

Sheets: How do you get smoked in a draft?

Amilian: JamesOn could find a way to smoke him.

Teams

Closing Arguments

Sheets: My team is clearly the best. We will have a controlled tempo, eat up the clock and keep the other offense off the field. I will have Thurman and Walt in the backfield with Walt lined up at either fullback (which he played also) or next to TT in a pro style set. On end of the line we have a beast in Rivers who can block and catch balls with any TE to ever be at OSU.

On one side out wide we have our go to guy in HLD who has the size and strength to go over the middle and the speed to stretch the field. On the other we have the ultimate homerun hitter in Prentiss, a guy with unmatched speed.

At the QB spot we have a gamer with as strong an arm as anyone not named Weeden who can live up to big moments, Bob Stoops can back me up on that. Backing my guys up we have one of the best RB to play at osu in Thompson, someone who just carried the team and program in the mid 90’s. John Lewis will provide a clutch possession receiver who isn’t scared to make big plays.

I can’t find any holes that won’t be filled by my excess talent in other areas and I don’t think the defenses will disagree. My team is too balanced and its not fair to you guys and I’m sorry.

Regards,
Coach Sheets

Amilian: You know you don’t have the best team after an all-time OSU fantasy draft and say your strategy is to “eat up the clock.”

Sheets: The is how you play championship football, I’m not gonna be gimmicky, I’m gonna punch teams in the mouth. We will pass the ball, it will be a vertical passing game though, lots of play action. Real football.

Nolo: How did that work out for Stanford?

Nolo: Assuming we are judging who has the best team by who would win the most games, I don’t think there is any doubt that my team takes it.

My team’s players combined for more wins at OSU than any of yours. Add in the fact that most of them played together, and did so successfully, we already know they would have the chemistry to generate wins. Not only do I have the winningest team out there, I also have the all-around most talented. Everyone on my team has spent time in the NFL. Something none of you knuckleheads can boast.

My receiving corps of Blackmon/Bryant/Cooper is light years ahead of any of yours and I have the second best quarterback to ever lace ‘em up for OSU throwing to them. Not to mention the most talented tight end OSU has ever had in Pettigrew. Blackmon and Dez will are both #1 receivers for NFL teams along with being the two best receivers in OSU history. The rest of you combine for ONE guy who has ever played more than a year in the NFL at wideout.

In the backfield I have a guy who was the runner up in the Heisman race as a senior behind Erik Dickerson and was the #5 overall draft pick in Terry Miller. I have another NFL running back backing him up in Keith Toston who could come in during short yardage situations like he did at OSU. Like Toston, Donovan Woods wouldn’t see much playing time either but he would provide the selflessness and leadership to keep us on the right track. My team is the best and I honestly don’t really think it’s very close. Amilian’s team might be able to hang for a couple quarters, but Team Nolo just has too many weapons.

Fades and Fleaflickers,

Coach Cox

Amilian: Not sure you can say most combined wins when you’re counting some of those wins multiple times. And I can’t wait to see responses from knowledgeable OSU fans on your Pettigrew comment.

Nolo: What was wrong with my Pettigrew comment? I didn’t say Pettigrew was the best, I said he was the most talented. I think his draft position (20th overall) backs that up. Who else comes close? I don’t know what you mean by the “counting wins multiple times” comment. They are all proven winners and not only that, they proved they have the chemistry to win together.

Sheets: I’ve got as much or more talent at RB than anyone and I’m only having two WR so I’m god with my top two. My team is the most balanced. I don’t know where Nolan will fit his TE with so many WR out there.

Amilian: You have good RBs but that doesn’t make you a god.

Nolo: It’s called a 3 WR, 1 TE, 1 RB set, Sheets. Throw in a quarterback and 5 offensive lineman and you’ve got 11. I might even throw Donovan out there with Terry Miller and run some Wildcat. There’s unlimited possibilities.

Kyle: You guys are forgetting who has both the best (Barry) and most versatile (Randle) players on his squad. Namely, me. Gundy is unflappable behind center too, he’ll run the wing-t, go five wide, line it up in the super-I with Tatum, Barry, and Joe. He’s the Gundy Badger, he just doesn’t care.

You’re also forgetting about my big play ability with Bowman on the outside (back-to-back 1,000 yard seasons including a 300 (!) yard affair at KU) and my clutch play in the slot with the owner of the biggest catch in Oklahoma State history (TD Bryant) running wild. We haven’t even TOUCHED on Hermann Eben and his prodigious possession receiver abilities. Oh, and did I mention I have the defensive tackle on wheels (Mayes) catching comebacks and running out routes for the golden boy?

My balance is egregious too. You want shootouts, we’ll hand it to Barry and play-action to Bowman and give you your shootouts. You want to grind, we’ll rotate in three of the best backs in school history and grind you away. You can have Zac’s eyes and Dykes’ cars, I’ll take my Heisman trophy and see you in the postgame presser.

Nolo: You can run your “super eye” against Georgia Tech in the MinekeCarCare.com Bowl. Barry is going to have to carry you. It’s tough to argue your points about Hermann Eben or TD Bryant since I’ve never heard of them and they don’t show up anywhere in the OSU record books.

Amilian: You guys can argue for your quarterbacks all day long, but we all know the best player at the most important position is Weeden. Without question I have the best QB-WR duo with Weeden and Rashaun. Do you guys remember what happens when you have a quality running game and Rashaun woods at receiver? Bedlam 2002 happens, 12 catches for 226 yards and three TDs. That’s just scary. You want to talk running game? Kendall and Fenimore combined for FOUR 1st team All-American honors. This squad would make playaction illegal. And I’m sure you all wish you could claim the most versatile player at the ATH spot, but none of your guys touch the abilities of McQuarters, and at one point in his career he had the dreads to prove it.

Nobody can deny all our teams have some sick talent at RB and WR, but who’s leading those guys? It all comes down to the QB position. Imagine what the numbers would have looked like for Dykes, Rashaun, Bowman and Dez had they had Weeden throwing fades to them in the red zone? Everyone gets better with Weeden taking the snaps. So don’t argue balance, because I have more of it. Don’t talk to me about winning, because I have the QB who led OSU to 11- and 12-win seasons.

This team can do so many things. Scarrrrryyyyyyy

Nolo: I love how you just blatantly failed to mention three of the guys Weeden would have to throw to (out of embarrassment I assume) and instead chose to talk about your ATH who wouldn’t see the field and your backup runningback.

Amilian: D’Juan, Mayfield and Bajema are more than enough to keep the chains moving when defenses decide they have to double or triple Rashaun after he passes the 100 mark midway through the 2nd quarter. Any true OSU fan knows that.

Epilogue

And if you just made it through all that…you’re definitely a true OSU fan.