Are you guys ready…for one nationally televised game?!
Here’s Cleveland’s schedule…with some hard-hitting analysis, as you’ve come to expect.
Week 1: Sunday, Sept. 9, Philadelphia, 1:00 PM – The disparity in speed at the QB position in this game will be…vast.
Week 2: Sunday, Sept. 16, at Cincinnati, 1:00 PM – If Andy Dalton AND Bruce Gradkowski get hurt in Week 1, we could be looking at an OSU vs. OSU matchup at QB here.
Week 3: Sunday, Sept. 23, Buffalo, 1:00 PM – Bills fans will be saying “wait, we’re paying our guy $42M more than theirs?”
Week 4: Thursday, Sept. 27 at Baltimore, 8:20 PM – Good, because going to Ray-Ray’s house in a nationally televised game on a Thursday night in the fourth week of your rookie year should be amicable. Somebody get Melanie a hoodie, she might not want to watch.
Week 5: Sunday, Oct. 7, at NY Giants, 1:00 PM – It’s scary that this will be the better QB here.
Week 6: Sunday, Oct. 14, Cincinnati, 1:00 PM – Four more weeks for Dalton and Grad to get hurt!
Week 7: Sunday, Oct. 21, at Indianapolis, 1:00 PM Could be the two best rookie QBs squaring off…
Week 8: Sunday, Oct. 28, San Diego, 1:00 PM – I think Phil Rivers is actually a decent comp for Weeden even though he’s a little bigger and has a little more non-traditional release. I’m starting to sound like Kiper, probably about time to quit.
Week 9: Sunday, Nov. 4, Baltimore, 1:00 PM – At least Suggs will be out! Even though they drafted Courtney Upshaw!
Week 10: BYE
Week 11: Sunday, Nov. 18, at Dallas, 1:00 PM – I have to figure out a way to sneak into this game.
Week 12: Sunday, Nov. 25, Pittsburgh, 1:00 PM – Weeden slinging it around the yard while the Steelers pile up bodies in the trenches and render TRich useless? Yeah, I’ll watch (as long as I have DirecTV).
Week 13: Sunday, Dec. 2, at Oakland, 4:15 PM – Brutal game, although it’s would have been weird to go to a team six years ago and said “hey, in six years would you guys rather have the guy coming off a 4,000-yard season with a Heisman trophy in his back pocket or this guy?” And think about how wrong that answer would have been.
Week 14: Sunday, Dec. 9, Kansas City, 1:00 PM – Another road trip potential for OSU fans/me.
Week 15: Sunday, Dec. 16, Washington, 1:00 PM – Mmmmmmmmmmmm.
Week 16: Sunday, Dec. 23, at Denver, 4:05 PM – I wonder how far Weeden can throw it in the Rockies. Probably close to Uncle Rico far.
Week 17: Sunday, Dec. 30, at Pittsburgh, 1:00 PM – For a playoff spot?
“Week 16: Sunday, Dec. 23, at Denver, 4:05 PM – I wonder how far Weeden can throw it in the Rockies. Probably close to Uncle Rico far.”
+1
i literally laughed out loud.
Same here
That was hilarious! I can’t stop laughing! Uncle Rico far.
How awesome would it be if Matt Millen announced Week 7?
“Week 17: Sunday, Dec. 30, at Pittsburgh, 1:00 PM – For a playoff spot?
+1
i literally laughed out loud.
Ginger battle in week 2! Uncle Rico, is some funny $hit!
Kyle,
I am an OSU student that was born and raised in Cincinnati, and if Dalton and Gradkowski both get hurt I’m putting it completely on you, love Zac but If we could keep him from going up against Polamolu, Harrison, Ray Lewis and Suggs… I’d be ok with that. Go Pokes, and Who Dey
Weeden in Denver in December? I think I know what I want for Christmas.
Uncle Rico…. ROTFL
Isn’t it weird that Weeden could possibly be going up against Luck & Griffin AGAIN in his first pro year? Wouldn’t it be awesome if he beat them both again? LOL
Same here! That Uncle Rico had me laughing so hard! Good one.
I’m in for week 5 if he is still alive…
It’s best you left the MMMMMM on the Washington game in the best interest of your friendship with Chad. hahaha